Monday, January 3, 2011

SO appropriate

^^^ Lookie what I got for Christmas! HELLS TO THE YEAH!!!

I know I haven't been around much, and I have no excuses. It's not like I've been busy; on the contrary, I have basically been a total bum these past few weeks. Which sort of explains why I haven't really felt inspired. I mean, if you don't really leave your apartment for 2 weeks shit is bound to not happen.

BUT that won't be the case for long! Exactly one week from today, I will be starting my internships (2!) and classes will be resuming, and I will be working again, so plenty of ridiculous things are bound to occur and I will have LOTS to entertain you with, my dears.

A few funny things did happen, though. Not enough for a whole blog post each, but too long for tweets. I will compile them here.

1. We bought a Christmas tree, and forgot to water it for, like, 2 days. I remembered and watered it like crazy after that, but the damage had been done. The tree topper actually became too much for the tree and it started to wilt. No kidding. It looked like a limp penis.

(OK after lots of arguing with Paint, I can't make it work. The words say "Limp Penis Tree" heh heh)

2. Sitting in church on Epiphany, I got the giggles. As part of the processional, they had recruited 3 men to play the Kings and bring in their gifts, laying them at the altar, all while the congregation sang "We Three Kings." Now, I don't know if anyone else remembers "Will Vinton's Claymation Christmas," with the singing camels, BUT I DO. This memory makes it hard for me to not giggle during that song anyway, because ALL I can see in my head is those damn camels.

To add to my precarious state, the costumes the men were dressed in were CLEARLY from an earlier decade when people's bellies weren't so, well, big. So King 1's costume was stretched to capacity over his belly, and starting to bunch. And he was grinning like a fool. Not very reverent. Maybe he was the king that had too much to drink on the flight to Bethlehem? Hard to say. King 2 had obviously been roped into this by his wife (one of the pastors) and looked INCREDIBLY nervous, and very uncomfortable. Also? His robe was *just* barely not too long, so he was trying *really* hard not to trip. King 3's costume actually fit, and he also had some acting experience, so he looked very reverent, not goofy, and not awkward. The contrast was almost more than I could bear, so there I sat in the front row, with my head buried in my hymnal wiping tears of laughter off my cheeks. Because, you see, I am kind of friends with King 3 and we usually get the giggles in church anyway, so eye contact was out of the question. And then the chubby Asian acolyte clumped in and just looking at her always makes me giggle so you see, I really struggled to keep my shit together on Sunday.

3. The Duke got a puzzle as a gift from my Mom. It's 2000 pieces. TWO THOUSAND PIECES. I don't know if you know how big that is, but now that I know I wish I didn't know, ya know?

Some other funny shit probably happened too, but of course I can't remember it now.

Also, I got a new camera. And Miss Barfs A Lot is an attention whore. So I leave you with...

Wait for it...




Megan said...

Merry Christmas! And I know how big a 2000 piece puzzle is and I'm quite impressed!

The Duchess said...

You are officially invited to come and help us finish it. Please bring booze and maybe some snacks.